To nhỏ tâm sự với chị em!

Nhân dịp "Valentine" năm nay em cũng muốn góp vui với cả nhà bằng bài viết nho nhỏ em vô tình "lụm" được ;;) 46 Rules Guys Wish Women Knew Now listen up girls, n listen good take these with the pinch of salt but consider each one very very carefully. 1.If u think u r fat, u probably r. Dun ask us. We refuse to answer !!! 2.Learn to work the toilet seat. If it’s up, put it down. 3.Don’t cut ur hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive then short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then, u r stuck with her. 4.Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again. 5.If u ask a question u dun want an answer to, expect an answer u dun want to hear. 6.Sumtimes, we are not thinking about u. Live with it. 7.Dun ask us what we r thinking about unless u r prepared 2 discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks. 8.Sunday= Sports. It’s like the full moon or changing of the tides. Let it be. 9.Shopping is not a sport, and no, we r never going to think of it that way. 10.When we have 2 go sumwhere, absolutely anything u wear is fine. Really! 11.You have enough clothes. 12.You have tooooo many shoes. 13.Crying is blackmail. 14.Your ex-bf is an idiot. 15.Ask 4 what u want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints dun work. Strong hints dun work. Obvious hints dun work. JUST SAY IT!!!! 16.No, we dun know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar. 17.Yes, peeing standing up is more difficult. We r bound to miss sumtimes. 18.Most guys own 3 pairs of shoes. What makes u think we’d be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with ur dress? 19.YES and NO are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every questions 20.Come to us with a problem only if u want help solving it. That is what we do. Sympathy is what ur girlfriends r for. 21.A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. 22.Foreign films r best left 2 foreigners. 23.Check ur oil. 24.Dun fake it.We would rather be ineffective than deceived. 25.It’s neither in ur best interest nor ours to take the quiz 2gether. 26.No, it does not matter which quiz. 27.Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days. 28.If u won’t dress like the Victoria’s Secret girls, dun expect us to act like soap opera guys. 29.If sumthing we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes u sad or angry, we meant the other one. 30.Let us ogle. We r going 2 look anyway; it’s genetic. 31.Dun rub the lamp if u dun want the genie to come out. 32.You can either ask us to do sumthing OR tell us how u want it done- not both. 33.Whenever possible, plz say whatever u have to say during commercials. 34.Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we. 35.Women wearing Wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose their rite to complain about having their boobs stared at. 36.More women should wear Wonder bras and low-cut blouses. We like staring at boobs. 37.The relationship is never going to be like it was the first 2 months we were going out. 38.ALL men see in only 16 colours, like windows default settings. Peach is a fruit, not a colour. 39.Pumpkin is also a fruit. 40.If it itches, it will be scratched. 41.Beer is as exciting 4 us as handbags are 4 u . 42.If it is OUR house, I dun understand why MY stuff gets thrown in the closet/attic/basement. 43.We r not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about u. 44.If we ask what is wrong and u say “nothing”, we’ll act like nothing‘s wrong. We know u r lying, but it’s just not worth the hassle. 45.If we hear from an old girlfriend, we’ll briefly with her. But dun worry; the fantasy includes you AND her, 2gether. 46.What the hell is a doll?